their beliefs, habits, way of life. I try not to infringe on other's
rights. I try to treat people with respect. I try to allow people I
know to be themselves and appreciate their individuality. This is all
good as long as it doesn't infringe on me. There. I said it. I gotta
draw the line somewhere. I'm all about respect and courtesy, morals
and ethics. Black and white, right and wrong. I've got my opinion, you
have yours. In kindergarten (probably long before!), I learned it's
best to do unto others as you want them to do to you. I've analyzed my
life, myself, my actions. I've tried to learn from mistakes. I've
tried to be a better person. I seek to improve constantly. Blah, blah,
blah.
Are you bored yet? I'm getting there. Give me a minute! I'm laying the
foundation. You can't build the walls first, ya know?
So, with all this being said, this is what I TRY to do! It's still not
easy for me to take the high road! When someone "wrongs" me, I really
just want to sock it to them. Verbally! I don't want to get even. I
want to WIN! I want to be RIGHT! This is my immediate response. My
first gut reaction. Instinct. ME. Oh, no, I don't need any weapons of
choice cuz I've got my tongue. It's constantly with me. I take it
everywhere I go. Wouldn't be caught dead without it! Nope.
When I feel I'm wronged, I go straight to MAD! I do not pass Go. I do
not collect $200. I go straight to the jail cell and drag the other
with me. We are gonna rumble. Guard, look the other way. If you
interfere, you're next! There are two sides here... mine, and that
other persons', and you better pick one and place your bet. I let them
know just how wrong they are! I'm confrontational and my level of
anger matches the level of wrong done to me and the number of times
that person has wronged me. Accumulative. I'm really good at math, and
a number squared does not means "times two." Oh no, its not pretty.
To top it off, I keep score! I believe in, "the first time shame on
you, the second time shame on me!" And while this might make me feel
better temporarily, for that short moment in time, it's not good
karma, and it doesn't reflect well on me. Yes, I know! But, it sure
feels GOOD for the moment! Why worry about the outcome of that
outburst when I can worry about that later. Or not! After all, it will
come back to me.
Yes, Karma will find me, no matter where I am. She is crafty. She asks
around, sniffing out for clues. She is relentless in her search, never
wavering, never stopping for a coffee break. Have you seen that Carol
Ann lately? She asks everyone she meets. She asks those who know me
best. She stops in my favorite hangouts. She has been known to offer
payoffs. She takes bribes. She doesn't work for free, that's for sure.
Her clientele is extensive. That girl knows EVERYONE! She is quite the
networker. I think she invented it. Good ole Karma. Sometimes she is
in a good mood and I'm so happy to see her. Other times.... well,
let's just say I don't answer the door when she knocks. I know why she
has arrived and I make her serve me papers! No point in welcoming her
in! The lashing isn't going to be any easier if I do! Sigh.
I know Karma has me by a ball and chain. I know there is a GPS track
on me, watching my every thought, my movements, my associations with
others. So what's a girl to do? I'm a simple girl. John has said I'm
the cheapest high-maintenance girl he knows! Doesn't that count for
something? I don't ask for much. I just want to be happy. I want
others around me to be happy. So what now? Can we just say I'm working
on this, and call it good? I know I've got a problem. I admitted it.
Can we just stop there? Can we just let it go? I really don't want to
stand up and tell my story and finish the other 11 steps. I promise I
will try hard to be better, ok? Isn't that enough? Cut me some slack,
will ya? Please. I mean, after all, they STARTED it! I'm not allowed
to finish it? What!?! Did you say something? Whose side are you on,
anyway!?! Oh I get it! You and Karma are besties! You made a deal
with her! You got it like that? Now I know who has been tipping me
off. You better pick your side, and fast! Karma may be watching me,
but she is watching YOU too!
--
Production Princess/Owner
Bombshell Pin-up Productions™
913-669-3423
At Bombshell, we don't ask for much. We just want to change the world. One
Bombshell Girl™ at a time.
"Bombshell Girls" and "Bombshell Pin-up Productions" are trademarks of
Bombshell, L.L.C. All Rights Reserved.
www.Bombshells.info
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